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How to come out of this on TOP

Hi friends,

We definitely didn’t see this coming, yet here we are.  It seems like the right time to write some kind of uplifting article about, “It’s going be okay,” or, “we are almost through this unprecedented time,” or, “hang in there”. 

Sorry folks this article will not be an iteration of the same. I wanted to take this time to talk about how to keep focused on the important things. Specifically, those running a Family Business, there will be many important things to consider.

Firstly, a Family Business has to support not only the family members but also the employees who have become like family members.  Family Businesses do not have a fight or flight mentality.  Rather they have to FIGHT and then fight some more which certainly causes stress for all involved.

Many businesses are shut by law, many are operating as an essential service with a new element of fear, and many are operating as if everything is fine (those are the scariest ones).

The #1 stressor I am finding is not knowing WHEN
When I ask people, “If I told you, you have to quarantine until July 5, would that be okay?” They all say yes. 
If I stretch that date until September 12, the answer is still a resounding YES! 
Why? It comes back to the idea of NOT KNOWING.

If we are given a target, it becomes a real deadline. Unfortunately, we do not have that luxury in these circumstances.

So what do we do?

Here are some things that many companies are doing:

  1. Make a business plan of what needs to be done when you can return to your business.
     
  2. Reach out to suppliers/customers and employees with a “just checking in to see how you are doing” type of email or have an actual phone conversation.
     
  3. Review your important documents including wills, life insurance policies (many companies are letting you buy more without the usual medical requirements), corporate P&C insurance,  current shareholder agreements, leased premises, and if you qualify for the government relief program. 
     
  4. Check to see if your line of credits will suit your business when you get back to business.  
     
  5. Start that Succession Plan and begin to have those conversations with the key players.
     
  6. Call Phil (that’s me!) to help begin those discussions

I know I had to throw in number 6…hope it made you smile! 🙂

We are in this for a while. There is no quick exit, so let’s try and find ways to move your business and your planning forward together.

Then you can focus on the success of your business when you get the green light to do so.

Have a question? Please give me a call at (905) 902-7799.  I am working from home (you will likely hear a dog barking when we chat), and I would love to have a conversation with you…even for a friendly hello! 

Like many of you, I MISS PEOPLE!! Stay safe everyone.

Merry Christmas!

keep calm and carry on ball

What a great year 2019 has been! 

Working with families in business has always been satisfying but no more so than this year!  I am so lucky in that I get to work with a spectrum of families that work well together, but need a bit of help in their communication, all the way along to families who cannot even find the words to communicate and are so stressed out over it.

This is the time of year to take a deep breath, put your family and their happiness at the top of your to-do list, and postpone those stressful issues you’ve had all year until January. 

Give me a call or send me an email and I will help you untangle some of those stressful issues so your business will run effectively in 2020, and your family life will run smoother.

I want to wish you all a Merry Christmas, happy holidays.
Create great memories this season surrounded by your family! 

To you and your family’s health, wealth & happiness!
Phil

The Partnership No One Knew They Were In

As a Mediator and a Family Business Expert, it is always fascinating to explain to people why there is such an overlap in these two fields. 

Let’s think about it, Conflict and Family Business…there may be some who will instantly see how these two areas mesh together.  For others, you have to believe me when I tell you that even the most harmonious Family Business has a few skirmishes they deal with from time to time.

I am going to spin a very different idea about how these two sectors cross over.

Recently I was performing a multi-party mediation. Things were heating up over mom’s estate who just passed away. The estate consisted of three properties:  mom’s condo, a Florida home, and the family cottage. There were substantial invested (liquid) assets, numerous family heirlooms, and art. There was a current will.

As you can imagine, the group was still emotional sine they were still grieving the loss of their matriarch.

How do they move forward?

As with most estate mediations, it becomes a “Mom or Dad promised that to me.” There is lots of talk around the various “side deals”. And as we know, if it is not in writing, then it must be assumed that it didn’t happen.

This family was in an escalating conflict. At each discussion, it got more heated. The siblings who previously got along fairly well now were having a hard time being in each other’s company.

An email came in from one of the lawyers. Can you help this family out? After a brief discussion, we got everyone together.  

There are 4 siblings and 2 were legally represented. No one really knew how this was going to go. The room was filled with tension and everyone was extremely guarded.

Then I BROKE THE ICE. I explained how we would be a lot more communicative and successful if we treat Mom’s estate as a business.

It was now their Family Business and they were now all partners in this business. 

The guards came down and the inquiring questions (vs. accusatory ones) started coming out. 

Those who were represented by their lawyers were becoming a bit more collaborative and the siblings started being friendly once again. They are now partners in a new Family Business and are acting like business partners.

This story is still continuing, but the family is beginning a meaningful and respectful liquidation of some assets and working well together in managing the other assets.
They have regular “management meetings”, regular disbursements and most importantly, they are having frequent family gatherings, which is what Mom and Dad would have wanted.

So are you or your clients struggling with your new “Family Business/Estate”?

Let’s have a chat and find a breakthrough that works for you or your clients.

The End of Conflict in the Family Business

This title will always grab your attention. If you are in or near Family Business conflict, you suddenly have hope!!

Or do you? 

There is the magical ending to conflict, where everyone is heard, issues get resolved, and the business starts running better with fantastic communication.  Wouldn’t that be great if that was the resolution and results everyone is looking for?

There is another end to the conflict which is what I am writing about in this article.  It is the final decision to no longer be in the family business/partnership anymore and move on.  It is the end of a parent/child partnership, a sibling partnership, a cousin partnership or any kind of partnership. 

It is clear that the emotional component of these breakups is going to often dominate the discussions going forward.  It is usually impossible to separate out the business only issues.

I believe it was Gwyneth Paltrow who coined the phrase, “conscientious decoupling” in describing her marriage break up. 

A brilliant way of saying, “we are through but going to do this without killing each other”. 

This is what the new goals become.  How to be fair to each other, leave with what you deserve, pay something that is reasonable, and for a real long shot; fight to preserve the relationship no matter what.  This is often the first thing to go, unfortunately.  Emotions take over, and frustrations bubble up quickly.

There is a way to do this and preserve family relationships. 

It is about utilizing the right professionals for appraisals and valuations, combined with effective communication.  This transparency and open approach often help keep tempers in check.

This is what I do.  If things cannot be repaired, and the mutual decision is made to “decouple”, then let me help you do this with a focus on preserving as much of the positive family relationships as possible. 

Give me a call and let’s chat.

Mediation & The Family Business

It is not uncommon for family businesses and their managing families to be in conflict. 

There are the “every day” conflicts of running the operating company.  These can include debates on machinery acquisitions, pricing policies, supplier relationships, customer relationships, etc.

For some instinctive survivalist reason, these conflicts generally get solved one way or another as they are purely about the business at hand.  Someone loses an argument here but may win one over there.  The expression “pick your battles”must have originated in this playing field! They get solved. The business must continue to move forward.

What about the conflicts that don’t get so easily resolved?
It is not a pricing issue, a supplier issue, or a receivable issue.  It is a fundamental disagreement about something much greater.  It can be a conflict such as:

  • Where is our next level of growth coming from?
  • How come our younger brother/sister never shows up at the office until payday?
  • With Mom and Dad spending the winters away, how come they still get to hold all of the purse strings?
  • How do my kids get involved or should they?

These conflicts usually spend a great deal of time simmering before they NEED to be resolved.

So these are clearly family business issues but what do they have to do with Mediation?

Mediation skills and tactics help family businesses in so many ways.  Firstly, they begin to set the table for improved communications.  Communication in family businesses is usually poor or nonexistent.  Developing an agenda of specific items that need to be discussed is one of the first steps. In working with family businesses, the initial intake work done often will provide valuable feedback on the type of communication within the family both personally and corporately.

Secondly, with the Mediator, their skills of drilling deep inside the issues in the individual intake, will uncover many of the areas of simmering conflict within the family.  By understanding the nature of those conflicts from everyone’s perspective allows them to be brought up in a safe, inclusive manner. By maintaining control as one would in a formal mediation session; these subjects can be brought forward, thoroughly discussed and ideally resolved one at a time.

As in mediation, unresolved issues often must be “parked” for a future meeting. Sometimes that can be frustrating, but in a family business context, isn’t that really a great way to plan the next meeting? This begins the process of having a more formal structure for better family business communication.

The Mediator/Facilitator maintains control, but all voices are heard and most importantly, there are multiple participants helping solve the various issues.  By putting items in a “parking lot” for the next meeting, the participants are charged with working on clarifying their understanding and position with regards to these “parked” issues. They may be encouraged to try and have less formal discussions with those they have the conflict with. But they do know it will be coming up at the next meeting and a resolution will be the focus. 

This mediation inspired approach has often led to entirely new ways of dealing with conflicts within the day-to-day dealings inside the operating company. Rather than some hierarchical declaration (decision) made from one’s perch on a corporate organizational chart, the concept of collaboration begins to find its way into the decision-making process. Perhaps some more input is sought, more ideas are discussed, and the team has a safer environment in which to contribute their thoughts. 

Have a great long weekend and a safe summer!

The Fun Season of Scheduling the Cottage…not!

picking sheet out of a bowl

We just completed the weekend that us winter-weary Canadians somehow use to signify the start of summer. 

For those who own cottages, it is often the week of getting the dock in the water, the waterlines filled, the septic treated and an overall assessment of what damage winter did to your place.

It is the time when families start to plan their “vacation” weeks or weekends that they want to book. 

It is the time that families start to argue over who gets the “good” weeks or the long weekends. 

It is the time that Mom and Dad roll their eyes and say, “Here we go again!”

It is the time that I get the phone calls asking, “What do we do, it’s happening again?”

The best cases involve properly facilitated family discussions LONG before the Victoria Day weekend.  We gather the stakeholders and share our thoughts in a safe and open environment about how to properly share this beloved family retreat. 

Perhaps there are events like birthdays or anniversaries that certain members want to host at the cottage and thus need a specific date. Or it is tied to plans involving kids going to camp and missing out on their traditional times at the cottage.  It could be a variety of circumstances, but if they are properly discussed and everyone is heard, the results tend to come easier (when facilitated by someone like myself).

Ooooops. You waited too long. What do we do today after some tense discussions? 

We can try and have that stakeholders meeting and get everyone together knowing there is some added incentive due to being in May already. 

You say, “It won’t work, no one is available and some are clamoring for specific dates already?” 

Then its PLAN B TIME!!

This plan works and please consider this plan as my gift to you, the cottage owner, who face these situations every year. It’s time for a draw!

Yes, an old school drawing of names from a hat/bag style of “picking”.  Every week that is available (Mom and Dad get whatever week they want just because) is written down on a piece of paper, folded up and stuffed into a hat.  

But first, there needs to be a separate draw for each stakeholder to determine the order of WHO draws first (this adds to the fairness).

Weeks are then drawn in order and if you want to switch with someone else then that’s between the “kids or the stakeholders” who wish to trade. 

The gift in all of this is simple.  Mom and Dad do NOT have the PRESSURE of choosing one over the other.

It isn’t the prettiest solution but it’s the one that can be implemented on short notice without having everyone in the same room. Someone may not get what they want but in the spirit of fairness, it works. 

Sometimes simple is better. 

If you want to learn more about keeping the “cottage peace“, then let’s have a chat!

Transitions Group